Steven Alexander Wright (born December 6, 1955) is an American comedian, actor and writer.
Red Sox Eduardo Rodriguez Lars Anderson Alan Alda Rick Porcello David Price Joe Kelly Tim Wakefield Aaron Sanchez Drew Pomeranz Chris Sale Clay Buchholz Jessica Lange Steve Buscemi Henry Owens John Farrell Doug Mirabelli Jackie Bradley Jr
Ranking Danny Among GM's, Horford's Play in the Low Post, Wright's Place in the Rotation, & MORE!!
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. Steven Wright (1955) . via:
Is it weird in here, or is it just me?-- Steven Wright
I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full. house and four people died. -- Steven Wright
Oladipo, Steven Adams, Enes Kanter and other key players. Difference is Harden and Kwahi make their team better, Russ doesn't
When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect then they told me nobodys perfect so I stopped practicin…
Im watching the best night time talk show on. Johnny Carson reruns. Steven Wright is on tonight.
Eduardo Rodriguez is slightly ahead of Steven Wright and Drew Pomeranz in terms of progress this spring, pitching coach…
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory - Steven Wright
Yep. This is why I always liked comedians like Mitch Hedberg, Demetri Martin, and Steven Wright. Their jokes were...
The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright, like jus...
"A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking." - Steven Wright.
"A conclusion is the place where you stopped thinking." Steven Wright
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate. - Steven Wright
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism, to steal ideas from many people is "research". - Steven Wright
Dombrowski on podcast: Pomeranz, Wright 'penciled in' for 4th, 5th spots (H/T
“When I was a kid we had a sandbox. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child...eventually.”― Steven Wright
"Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour." ~ Steven Wright
"Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?". - Steven Wright
"Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks." - J. Steven Wright
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep well?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes. Steven Wright
This restaurant was advertising breakfast any time. So I orderedfrench toast in the renaissance.- Steven Wright, comedia
"I just got my degree in calcium anthropology...the study of milkmen." - Steven Wright
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he. just whipped out a quarter?. -- Steven Wright
saw Lenny Clarke, Steve Sweeney, Steven Wright at toast for Don Gavin. Hosted by tony v and jimmy dunn. Gary Gulman too!
I went to school with Steven Wright, who was the shyest guy I knew, and ...
Top 5 stand up comedians in no order: Steven Wright, Eddie Murphy, Mitch Hedburg, Louis C.K., Dave Chappelle.
Way to go Steven Wright, starting his business and promoting
Oh, the taxi drove us by its campus a couple of times on the way to Barclays Center a few years ago.
"I love on a one-way street that's also a dead end. I'm not sure how I got there." Steven Wright
I played a couple dynasty seasons as LIU Brooklyn in College Hoops 2K7. That's the extent of my knowledge of that university.
If you tell a joke in the but was it a joke? - Steven Wright
TD Redskins there you go Steven Wright 7-6 4:11 left in 1st half.
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance. ~ Steven Wright
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything. ~Steven Wright
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths ~Steven Wright
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. – Steven Wright
Steven Wright I bought some batteries but they werent included. ok
Oh yes plz do trade for Steven Wright
The Braves should trade for knuckleballer Steven Wright via /r/Braves
My told me, "I couldn't repair your so I made your horn louder." – Steven Wright
Change is inevitable.except from vending machines. - Steven Wright
Dating back to last year, of Steven Wright's last 14 starts he's allowed 3 earned runs or less in 13 of them. Gone 6+ inn…
He asked me if I knew what time it was -- I said yes, but not right now.-- Steven Wright
I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and4 people died.-- Steven Wright
Steven wright voice: I intend to live forever, so far so good
Steven Wright solid, but Red Sox offense struggles in loss to...
. Steven Wright turns to Mike Tomlin. "The entire world of people around u have really small eyes."
"Horses just naturally have Mohawk haircuts." ~Steven Wright
Some of my biggest influences are people like Steven Wright and Todd Ber...
I know the body isnt even cold yet, but let's not forget Steven Wright would have been pitching last night if Farrell hadnt used him as a PR
Remember when Farrell made Steven Wright pinch run? And he broke his shoulder? And now Buchholz is pitching an elimination game?
Steven Wright will not throw a bullpen on Sunday- feels he's not ready.
Steven Wright will not throw a bullpen tomorrow with Red Sox. Shoulder not there. Theyll keep trying with him
Steven Wright not ready for a bullpen on Sunday. Obviously deceases the odds of a return. But he will continue throwing program.
Steven Wright might not pitch again his year. Thanks John
Steven Wright getting second opinion on his shoulder
Nick,Rodrigeuz,Steven Wright...give me a break !
The Nos. 7,8,9 pitchers in fWAR in the American League, in order entering today: David Price (3.3), Steven Wright (3.2),…
Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night. . --Steven Wright
Steven Wright to DL. Clay Buchholz to start Thursday. Elias optioned. Ramirez to bereavement list for three days. Corres…
The Red Sox will place RHP Steven Wright on the disabled list (retroactive to Monday), which puts Clay Buchholz... https:/…
Steven Wright, Sandy Leon lead Boston Red Sox to 9-0 rout over the Los Angeles Dodgers
Dustin Pedroia, Steven Wright, Joe Kelly, Aaron Hill and Bench Coach Torey Lovullo are all California natives.
Peter Thiel wants to defeat death. How is it working out for him? So far, so good. (H/t Steven Wright)
Drew Pomeranz, Eduardo Rodriguez, Steven Wright, & Rick Porcello. Guys along with Price I can be confident in down the stretch.
Price, Rick Porcello, Steven Wright, Pomeranz and Eduardo Rodriguez is rotation for next few years which is good enough
Drew Pomeranz is now the AL ERA leader. Second place? His teammate Steven Wright.
David Price, Rick Porcello, Steven Wright, Drew Pomeranz and Eduardo Rodriguez. rotation through '18. Pretty good w/ that lineup.
How is it that Steven Wright has the highest ERA in the AL & he is not even getting one inning. Someone call Doug via police escort... 🚨🚨🚨
I'd love to see Steven Wright throw a few batters in the but we might need to dig up Doug Mirabelli to catch for him
BREAKING: Doug Mirabelli en route to ASG to catch Steven Wright
Best stand-up: Steve Martin (let's get small), Steven Wright, Eddie Murphy, Woody Allen, and, yeah, Chapelle
Brandon Belt. They countered with Steven Wright, Keuchel or Martinez plus Marte
I think Steven Wright is in there as well as Cole Hamels. It almost has to be Sale.
Danny Salazar Cole Hamels and Chris Sale are all so talented. Idk how you can give the ASG to a scrub like Steven Wright.
Steven Wright really doing his thing lol representing Valley View as the best pitcher in the American League. CRAZY
As brightfully said (ya, I said it) Steven Wright's grip might have been affected by 98 degrees and 100% humidity.
There are 4 Cubs starters, Steven Wright, Tyler Chatwood, Marco Estrada, and Chris Tillman in ERA+ top 15.
you can't touch the knuckler!! My son Steven Wright pitching like Cy
Adam Jones with a 2-run HR to LF in the 7th. No shutout for Steven Wright. down 6-2
Steven Wright hadn't given up an earned run in 23 2/3 innings before Adam Jones hit a two-run home run over the Green Monste…
I think the Indians want a redo on Lars Anderson for Steven Wright
Steven Wright continues to mow everyone down at the plate. His journey throughout the years has just been incredible to watch.
Betts, Pedroia, Bogaerts, Ortiz, Ramirez, Bradley, Young, Shaw, Vazquez with Steven Wright trying to move back into tie for first.
Steven Wright better on the road than at Fenway. 1.45 away ERA vs 3.07 at home. Tyler Wilson just too new to really read into 2.79 era vsSOX
Also, my excitement to see a Tyler Wilson v. Steven Wright pitching duel is through the roof.
I have Steven Wright and I was offered Jackie Bradley Jr & Carlos Rodon for him but should trust any of them and do this
I didn't realize how dominant Steven Wright for the Red Sox this year. Glad the Indians got Lars Anderson for him...
Win it!. Red Sox 8 Twins 1 . Awesome pitching by Steven Wright, & great hitting by Bogaerts, Bradley, others.
Trevor Plouffe grounds out, pitcher Steven Wright to first baseman Hanley Ramirez.
As Christopher Smith of points out the Lars Anderson-for-Steven Wright trade at the July 2012 deadline was pretty darned good
Like Buchholz, Robbie Ross Jr. and Steven Wright understand shuttling back and forth between rotation and relieving.
Buchholz isn't the first starter to move to the bullpen. Robbie Ross and Steven Wright share insights on their moves
Jason Hammel is the Cubs 4th starter (2.09 ERA). Steven Wright is the Red Sox 4th (2.45 ERA)
boy that Steven Wright, Lars Anderson swap is looking great right now
Lars Anderson finally paid off in the form of Steven Wright: Bill Foley (Contributing…
Just a reminder that Cherington traded Lars Anderson to the Indians for Steven Wright at the deadline in 2012.
Orioles batters have no answer for knuckleballer Steven Wright, who throws complete game. Baltimore Sun
Steven Wright was a beast in the Red Sox' 7-2 win over the Orioles -
This Knuckleball from Steven Wright might be the best I have ever seen
Pitchers with three complete games this season:. Steven Wright (including today). Johnny Cueto. Clayton Kershaw. Chris Sale
How can you hit a Steven Wright knuckleball. FILTHY.
I would respectfully suggest to Dave O’Brien that “tie this one up” is not the best way to describe what Steven Wright wants to do.
Fell asleep at 1-0, woke up to Dave O'Brien's screaming call of Hernandez's 1st HR. 7-2. Steven Wright still in. This is a Good Team.
Dave O'Brien and Steven Wright's last knuckleball: "You could read Rob Manfred signature all the way to home on that one.…
If at first you don't succeed,. destroy all evidence that you. tried.─Steven Wright
Steven Wright is back out to start the eighth inning, 109 pitches deep. Tommy Layne is warming, so this might be Wright's la…
Pitchers who have a worse ERA- than Steven Wright right now: Jordan Zimmermann, Johnny Cueto, Jon Lester, Stephen Strasburg, Gerrit Cole.
There’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an *** -Steven Wright
Colby Lewis and Steven Wright have combined for 15 quality starts. one more than the Royals
Johnny Cueto joins Chris Sale, Clayton Kershaw and Steven Wright as the only pitchers with multiple CG this season.
I'd rather sound like Steven Wright than Bill Clinton.. which happens when my throat is gone.
Steven Wright went 8 solid innings, but gave up 3 runs, and took the loss. Jackie Bradley Jr. extended his hitting …
Bad news: lose to 3-2. Good news: Jackie Bradley Jr. extends hit streak to 23 games & another quality Steven Wright start.
Watching a bit of natural born killers and just hit me - are Steven Wright & related??
FOX SPORTS telling Steven Wright (the Boston Comedian) jokes. Every time pitches, announcers do this.
I love Steven Wright. I was in high school in the '80s, and there was ...
Plus it has a tremendous cast. Aside from CK himself, it stars Steve Buscemi, Edie Falco, Jessica Lange & Alan Alda. Oh, and Steven Wright.
Jackie Bradley Jr., Steven Wright and Mookie Betts thoroughly enjoyed today's visit to the *** League Museum.
Ian Kennedy will start the day game (against Steven Wright) for the Royals tomorrow. Edinson Volquez will face David Price…
“There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an *** ” . ― Steven Wright.
“If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.” . ― Steven Wright.
was funnier when Steven Wright said it 20 years ago
John Farrell continues to struggle with in game management calls. Steven Wright stays in too long allowing 6 of 7 batters to reach.
GM Mike Hazen on Steven Wright: "Tim Wakefield said early in the season...this guy is ready to take off"
ICYMI: My column on the 2016 Steven Wright and the 1995 Tim Wakefield. Is history repeating?
Buckley: Steven Wright has the feel of Tim Wakefield in 1995 – Boston Herald
Herald column: Just spoke with Tim Wakefield, who thinks Steven Wright can do what he did back in '95.
MLB: Wright's rise continues with masterful 3-hitter: Steven Wright's emergence has been a growing st...
Steven Wright pulling anin the Bronx tonight.
It's Steven Wright's world and we're just living in it.
When someone tells Steven Wright he can't keep up this run of solid outings
Chris Colabello gets gift from Steven Wright after beaning...
I can't deal with non sequiturs, one liners, the delivery. It's Bob Nelson, Steven Wright, over and over again.
Just realized it’s the 10-year anniversary of the Doug Mirabelli police escort, and now I just want Steven Wright to be pitching today.
Wright, Steven: "If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?"
I wish when I was a baby my first words were "quote" that way right before I die I could say "unquote". - Steven Wright
I just got out of the hospital after a speed reading accident. I hit a bookmark. -- Steven Wright
Vote for Steven!! If nothing else, it's because Mrs Wright did this amazing dance which I can't even.
[was hitting his spots, changing his speeds really well”. Uehara …
I bought some powdered water but I don’t know what to add. STEVEN WRIGHT
Red Sox pitcher Steven Wright sends apologyy gift after...
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? By Steven Wright
. A friend of mine has a trophy wife but apparently it wasn't for first place. - Steven Wright
"Hi, the reason I look and sound like this is that I'm practicing a Steven Wright impersonation I'm never going to use..."
I'm going to have to explain I'm doing a horrible Steven Wright impersonation for the party I'm hosting tomorrow night.
[You Don’t Know Football]But the trustworthy duo cracked. In the eight inning it was clear Koji …
Wright, Steven: "It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature"
Inside story of how Red Sox found their best pitcher (so far), Steven Wright
Steven Wright does bring the romance. Enjoyed him in "Desperately Seeking Susan".
Steven Wright has now thrown 115+ pitches 3x this year. Only 1 other starter entering tonight (Garrett Richards) had done it 2x this year.
Now the bullpen should be fresh, really, Steven Wright and Clay Buchholz should go 8 innings against the Braves tonigh…
Betts, Wright Lead Red Sox to 6-2 Win Over the Astros: Steven Wright pitched into the seventh, and Mookie Betts…
Craig Kimbrel gets a Carlos Correa groundout to end a 6-2 Red Sox win over the Astros to start a 3-game series. Steven Wright is wondrous.
With Carlos Correa batting, wild pitch by Steven Wright, George Springer to 2nd.
A lot of fans are worried about slow start but can we talk about Steven Wright? This guy is starting off hot & I love it
Legendary comedian Steven Wright comes to on Apr 25. Read more via
very classy Chris of both Steven Wright to send you the gift & you to thank him. The public needs to see more of this! 😊
. Not given Steven Wright will be out of rotation once Eduardo Rodríguez returns -
Great outing for Aaron Sanchez, but another solid one for Steven Wright too. Wright has earned his keep as part of this rotation.
Little by little, Aaron Sanchez is seeing his fastball velocity drop. He'll be down to Steven Wright levels by the 14th inning.
Another excellent start by Steven Wright, doesn't deserve to go to the bullpen when Rodriguez returns
Seriously, I can't wait Eduardo Rodriguez comes back and people are actually going to go "Well we can't risk losing Steven Wright!!"
Really need Eduardo Rodriguez to come back soon so I don't have to see Steven Wright pitch every 5th day
At Lineups for at at 1:35 PM ET. Aaron Sanchez (0-0) vs. Steven Wright (0-1)
Steven Wright on the mound vs Aaron Sanchez & the today for game 3 of a 4 game series. (Red Sox lead series 2-0)
Steven Wright is the first MLB pitcher this season to throw as many as 118 pitches. Last year, Joe Kelly was the first to get there.
Someone pay for a one way ticket to Pawtucket for Clay Buchholz, Joe Kelly, and Steven Wright. Don't belong on a MLB roster.
I think you would travel back to 1980 and tell all the jokes later written by Emo Philips and Steven Wright.
Going from Steven Wright to David Price for the home opener is like upgrading from bosco stix to a T-bone steak
if Jay Wright is the Steven Wright of coaching, Bill Belichick is the trunk of props in a Carrot Top show
Steven Wright pulled after 5 2/3 w/ runners on the corners. Robbie Ross Jr. in to face Justin Smoak in a 2-2 game, bot 6th
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out. -- Steven Wright
“I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.” Steven Wright
So our actual No. 5 which is Rick Porcello will be our No. 4 and I think No. 5 should Steven Wright
Are you referring to Steven Wright and Roenis Elias?
Not a good day for Henry Owens as he competes for 5th rotation spot. Roenis Elias and Steven Wright also vying for the job.
Roenis Elias, Henry Owens, & Steven Wright are the candidates to replace Eduardo Rodriguez in the Red Sox rotation.
This girl is making Steven Wright look like Jack Nicholson!
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread. - Steven Wright
Steven Wright: "I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it."
"Last night I was in a restaurant called Bulimia's. The line for the bathroom was incredible." Steven Wright
Kanesha: LOL I don't know how Steven Wright, the comedian stays so dead pan. Briana: My girlfriend and I are in a…
Only Steven Wright amount of days until the home opener! (35)
"Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have." -Steven Wright
I've noticed that a high percentage of pilots seem to have the vocal cadence of Steven Wright.
"I’m going to get a tattoo over my whole body of me but taller." - Steven Wright
"The other day I... uh, no, that wasn't me." ~Steven Wright |
I hate it when my leg falls sleep in the middle of the day, because that means it`ll be up all night. By Steven Wright
Experience is something you don't get untiljust after you need it -Steven Wright.
A lil humor: "If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you."~Steven Wright. Smiles! Judy💜
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.-- Steven Wright
Steven Wright pitching for the Sox. Anywhere's walking distance if you have the time.
"All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand." -Steven Wright. And the great ideas wonks repeat but never prove?
When I die, I'm gonna leave my body to science fiction.
My office is so dry today that it's mumbling Steven Wright jokes.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese Steven Wright
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff. -Steven Wright
"If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?" ~Steven Wright |
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. -Steven Wright
I almost had a pyschic girlfriend, but she left me before we met. By Steven Wright
I bought some batteries but they weren`t included, so I had to buy them again. By Steven Wright
The Quotes of Steven Wright:. 1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. 2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't...
"The other day I put instant coffee in my microwave oven ... I almost went back in time." -- Steven Wright
You can't have everything...where will you put it? -Steven Wright
YOU GOTTA LAUGH. “I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart.” . ― Steven Wright
Horace and Pete. Where the ... what the ... Louis CK, Steve Buscemi, Alan Alda, Steven Wright, Jessica Lange ... great stuf…
Horace and Pete, in no particular order: Alan Alda, Steve Buscemi, Edie Falco, Jessica Lange, Steven Wright. How could you not want this?
I seriously thought Alan Alda was dead. has a pretty amazing cast, especially performances by Edie Falco and Steven Wright.
Alan Alda and Steven Wright talkin about Bambi, man
Did I ever tell you guys that way back in the 1980s I saw Steven Wright in concert and the opening act was Randy Newman? True story.
The cast in Louie CK and Steve Buscemi's Horace & Pete is epic. Alan Alda, Steven Wright, and Jessica Lange all killing it. Worth the buy.
"I installed a skylight in my apartment... the people who live above me are furious!" ~Steven Wright
Craig Steven Wright should just change a bit the algo and create new alternative bitcoin ?
If God dropped acid, would he see people?- Steven Wright
Today's thread is about the best of Steven Wright, i don't call him a comedian, he's someone with a vast imagination. i'll share videos.
"I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering." - Steven Wright
"I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, " Got any shoes you're not using?" - Steven Wright.
Roger Federer is exactly what people want Tiger Woods to be at their respective career points.
I have an existential map; it has `you are here` written all over it. By Steven Wright
Ugh, we need a reseed pronto. Afraid we're going to miss out on Federer-Murray. Been the best two, but Raonic can reach the final.
Light travels faster than sound, isnt it why that some people appear bright until you hear them speak? - Steven Wright
When I was on TV in the '80s, I wasn't thinking, 'There's a 10-year-old kid...
Andy Halliday was released because he was too much a Rangers man by Steven Wright .
♥If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know? ~ Steven Wright
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect. -- Steven Wright
“I intend to live forever. So far, so good.”. —Steven Wright
"I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it." ~ Steven Wright
"If at first you don't succeed, Skydiving may not be for you.". -Steven Wright
Why is it a penny for your thoughts but you have to put your two cents in? Someone's making a penny. (Steven Wright) ht…
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. Steven Wright
did Mitch Hedberg or Steven Wright make that list of comedians from the show this week?
I'd include Steven Wright, and to a lesser extent Brian Johnson.
Can't decide who is more dynamic: Steven Wright or Al Trautwig.
My friend George is a radio announcer, and when he walks under a bridge... you can't hear him talk ~Steven Wright
did Steven Wright age 20 years since the season ended!?
Steven Wright: "I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out."
Okay Steven stop acting hard because your auto Correct is sorting all of your spelling out for you
Two Emerson College grads on stage at Comics Come Home. Dennis Leary and Steven Wright.
"I want to get a full-body tattoo of myself except taller.” - Steven Wright
Gaffigan, Jim Norton, Robert Kelly, Joe Rogan are all great, Steven Wright another great one, Amy Schumer too.
If the season started today, I guess you could keep Joe Kelly in the bullpen with Steven Wright, and let Henry Owens open in the rotation
Really not much voice difference between a Steven Wright impression and a Coach Pagano lookalike do the Stanky Leg on the dance cam.
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.' Steven Wright
"I just put instant coffee in the microwave and I think I went back in time." - Steven Wright
"The imagination is the golden pathway to everywhere.". -Steven Wright.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? ~ Steven Wright
Steven Wright would be the king of filibusters
"I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific." Steven Wright
Comedians? Not really. Steven Wright, for instance, looks like he's paying homage to Ron Palillo.
"It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it." - Steven Wright. //cc
faced Chris Sale twice this year, starting Steven Wright and a fresh-off-the-DL Rick Porcello. They won both games.
Yeah that was good. Steven Wright delivery with an Andy Kaufman surrealism. I’m going to watch her HBO special tonight.
GIF: If you can't catch Steven Wright's Knuckleball, you definitely can't hit it.
Steven Wright out on a sacrifice bunt, pitcher Justin Nicolino to second baseman Dee Gordon. Jackie Bradley Jr. to 2nd.
I didn't know the Red Sox had called up Steven Wright.
Pat and Jake's Sox Take: the Napoli trade, Steven Wright, Blake Swihart, and more.
If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go? -Steven Wright
“I need a baby monitor that goes from my subconscious to my consciousness, so I can tell what the *** I’m thinking.” Steven Wright
Be nice to your children. After all, they are going to choose your nursing home. Steven Wright
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. - Steven Wright
International Women Donald Trump North Korea White House South Korea Wall Street Alec Baldwin Scarlett Johansson Skull Island House Republicans Paris Fashion Week Bayern Munich Romain Dauriac Chicago Public Schools President Donald Trump Tim Kaine National Insurance South Korean Philip Hammond Kellyanne Conway Jennifer Garner George Michael Fiat Chrysler Middle East Mark Zuckerberg Los Angeles Arsene Wenger Ed Sheeran Wang Yi Nintendo Switch President Trump Jose Mourinho Ben Carson North Korean Gigi Hadid Kim Jong Champions League Brandon Marshall Harry Potter Stella Mccartney Trevor Noah Boy Band South Africa Tom Price Russell Wilson Capitol Hill Deep State Military Hospital Real Estate Kim Jong Un Mutual Fund Kim Han Sol Hot Tub President Duterte House Speaker Paul Ryan Charlie Campbell Mary Berry Theo Walcott Tyrone Mings Samuel L Jackson St Patrick Emma Watson George Smiley Zayn Malik Julian Assange Lewis Hamilton Bruce Rauner Affordable Care Act Cook County Jail Glen Ellyn Islamic State Supreme Court Republican Party Hillary Clinton Kristen Stewart Chancellor Philip Hammond Dakota Access Kim Jong Nam Knights Templar Standing Rock Lord Heseltine Taylor Swift Theresa May Rand Paul Prue Leith Vanity Fair Good News Vice President Mike Pence Vampire Diaries Casey Anthony Jeff Sessions Dirk Nowitzki History Month Travel News Star Wars Ben Affleck State Department Justice Department Daily News George W. Bush