Newtons are a Nabisco trademarked version of the ancient Newtonian fig roll pastry filled with fig paste.
Homemade Fig NewtonsPosted on May 8, 2013 by Melissa KingBefore we cleaned up our diet, Fig Newtons were a big staple around here. We all know how Fig Newtons are often touted as a healthy cookie option for kids. So when I read the label for my Fig Newton Exposed post, I was disgusted at all the n...
Dear Fig Newtons, We... we need to talk. I'm really sorry, but I'm breaking up with you.
I have a fig newton craving right now. I don't know why...
Fun fact about me- my favorite cookie is the fig newton- I try to use them as currency, no one appreciates this about me.
I'm awfully depressed right now. I'm in my room in bed watching westerns and eating Fig Newtons. I've been on a crying jag tonight. I feel all alone.
Fig Newtons will be my worst enemy this camp! 😂😂 May 30th! BADABOOM
Nate is the most amazing man in the world! He just came home with 3 different kinds of chips ahoy cookies and a pack of Fig Newtons my favorite :) could my life get any better !
And booms goes the dynamite.lol..Fig Newtons are good ..like a light
Y'all I have the best customers I got a whole box of little Debbie and fig Newton today wonder what that means lol
Alright imma send u nudes anyways what's your snapchat? — Figgy_newton ;)
Finally made it home from hospitals and I am tired, ate a few Fig Newtons and a glass of milk for supper. Now to settle back and watch a little golf.
So like is a fig newton supposed to pass as a cookie¿
Yooo this fig newton over here sipping red wine like his wrist broke
dad is trying to make me eat a fig newton because he doesn't wanna be a fatty alone...he says I'll be jealous of his "fig newton body"
Malleya is acting like we are at a theme Park, she got a balloon, oreos, fig Newton, and juice now she has a graham ***
OH MY GOD I don't know how I have lived so long without these. Organic dried black mission figs from whole foods. No added sugar or preservatives. Tastes like a fig newton but a thousand times better. I bought them yesterday and have been trying so hard to pace myself but the container is almost gone. Seriously dying.
"This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons." - Ricky Bobby.
Hold up... If you think about Fig Newtons while eating a nutri grain bar it is basically like you are eating a lengthy fig newton.
If you're craving a cookie: go for a whole grain fig newton instead of huge m&m cookie, it's a healthy version of a cookie and it's so good😍
Pretty random but a fig newton sounds really good right now
Last night as I sat reading the paper before retiring for the evening, I took a few Fig Newtons and with wild abandon I put them in the toaster oven and very lightly toasted them. Yes. Ps they all laughed at Christopher Columbus.
1 12 pack of toilet paper, 4 movie theatre candies, 2 bags of chex mix, notebooks, Fig Newtons, Pringles, and my good ole 2 lb bag of sour patch kids. All under $6!!(:
Literally bouncing off the walls after eating this. It tastes like a fig newton. I could run 6 marathons
This window sticker is dangerous but I do love Fig Newtons.
I bought Fig Newtons today.. weird.
with my baby girl My John, my Kristen, my lil fig newton, always there for me. Come home soon.
So, yesterday bug & i had a lazy day watched a movie in bed while snacking on some Fig Newtons. He fell asleep so i put him in his pack and play & went downstairs. I go to check on him and all i can hear is plastic crunching. Momma stupidly left the Fig Newtons on the nightstand & hunter on his tippy toes got them down (and yepp his pack & play is dropped all the way down bc hes learned how to get out of any chair, swing, and bc how quick he moves & crawls now). Needless to say- bugman looked like sully from monsters with purple chunks all over the place, lol!
Feeling not 2 Good ! Think i ate to many Fig Newtons bars with my coffee! blah... :P
I workout but my eating habits are horrible sometimes.alot of the times, I know they are.I mean who eats 4 packs of Fig Newtons...sometimes I wonder why I'm a size 2 lol
"Not by bread alone does man live. If I were hungry, and I were abandoned on the street, I would not ask a loaf but half a loaf and a book." ~ Federico García Lorca Be sure to check out more delectable treats masquerading as books at my blog post, including fig newton books on a library cart ~ Book (2003) by Péter Alpár
Fig Newton serving sizes are 2 cookies. Oreos are 2-3.
Sitting in traffic and loving me some Fig Newtons
Morning everyone armor on proverb read got all projects done yesterday I know Hunter Dixon is glad of that fun day ahead with family wish Brittany Dixon could be here don't worry britt I'll save you a fig Newton lol Every one have a blessed day
Recipe! These Fig Newton Knockoffs are a reader favorite and one of mine, too!
Recipe Time! This Fig Newton Knockoff recipe is a reader favorite and one of my…
Perfect! Neither am I...I'm a figment of your imagination.or a fig Newton...I can't decide
Already one of those days a really just dont give a Flying Fig Newton.
I was sleeping on a fig newton all night.
It's just a fig newton of your imagination
My weather app is saying there's 0mph wind outside and it feels like 55 degrees, somehow I find that just a little bit inaccurate
What kind of sick joke is MD playing on us, with the weather we've had to tomorrow where its going to feel like 16 degrees for practice
To the guy who smells like ketchup and armpit working out next to.. Go to ***
indirect to user Albert Prigodich . date me fig newton🗿🌚
""She's from Muslim" -she's deff Indian she's from Muslim
gotta keep you up to date on why this world is messed up. Because mom doesn't anymore
Apparently is feeling the need to give me a crash course on serial killers right now.
I made an obscure joke based on old Fig newton's marketing campaigns & nobody got it
A fig newton or a is similar to a fig roll. If you enjoy a fig roll u would definitely enjoy fig...
Enjoy this creepy vintage Fig Newton commercial, courtesy of
u know when u put on a coat u haven't worn in a while & u find a 20 in the pocket? Just happened to me, only it was a fig newton, not money.
If you aint sweatin, you're not doing it right
It’s more than a Newton! Karla Stocki CEO, Calif Fig Advisory Board explains to on
Not Steve Smith he is the panthers fig Newton ain't shyt with out him
Someone asked who my favorite idol was. I answered Billy
If you give a mouse a fig newton, chances are he'll look at you and be like *** is this
Gonna rock my stonehill football purple short shorts to the gym. I hope everyone here likes them as much as the football team
It might be a fig newton of my imagination …
I ate a fig newton thinking it was the last one but then I looked down and saw there was another one in my bag.
"I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FIG NEWTON!..." I love this man! (Pastor ricklgodwin, Summit Christian Center,…
but I'm just gonna be waking up! . A cigarette and a fig newton bar for me pal
That boys about as gangsta as a fig newton 😂😂😂 this show!
Today my science teacher tried to convince everyone in my class that Isaac Newton's real name was Fig
Why do normally rational people deny that the Fig Newton is the greatest cookie on the planet?
Reeses puffs are good at any time of the day under any circumstances
"alert we've got a two fig newton eater!" "How many did he have?!"
Dude gave me a fig newton at work. Faith in humanity restored.
Brian Eno and Neko Case are opening for Fig Newton tonight at the Hollywood Bowling alley. Event hosted by ME-ouch and SATAN CLAWS. Joshua Neyman
Its also International Hot & Spicy Food Day so go have your favorite and then eat the Fig Newton
Today is Peach Melba day Tue is Hot Pastrami sandwich day 15th is Strawberry Ice Cream day 16th is Fig Newton day AND HOT and SPICY Food day (hot sauce anyone?) 17th is Hot Buttered Rum day (only one day?) 18th is Gourmet Coffee day (Cafe Palmira here I come) 19th is Popcorn day (try it with a little hot sauce on top!)
Cam Newton looked more like a Fig Newton
November 20, 2013 Women I'm addicted to: I went to bed last night totally resolute in the fact that I would never watch or read another news item, commentary or puerile attempt at laugh seeking satire if it centered on the country's largest city's mayor. This morning, coffee in hand, I flicked on the screen and there it was - my first dilemma of the day. It wasn't the Toronto Star's headline; it was the name in the byline that had me. At this point I should tell you, that like the big guy at Toronto's city hall I too have an addiction. I can never seem to walk away from an article when the by line includes one of the names of my trusted trio. Are they always right? Probably not. Do I agree with them? Of course - why else would I read them? Rosie DiMano's summation of the past week's TV appearances by the Fords was well stated. And from Heather Mallick and I quote, "If I were tangled up in a scary spaghetti of my own lies — and Mayor Rob Ford is — I wouldn’t need a Fig Newton and a blankie for comfor ...
ELA: We are continuing our ARGUMENTATIVE essays. Please ask your student to read their essay aloud to you sometime this week! Task Thursday Pronoun Quiz Friday We are also studying: Interrogative Pronouns and Relative Pronouns An interrogative pronoun is used in a question. It helps to ask about something. The interrogative pronouns are what, which, who, whom, and compound words ending in "ever," such as whatever, whichever, whoever, and whomever. What on earth is that? Who ate the last Fig Newton? An interrogative pronoun may look like an interrogative adjective, but it is used differently in a sentence: it acts as a pronoun, taking the place of a noun. Who = a person -- Who are you? - Where = a place -- Where are you from? - When = time -- When was Malia Obama born? - How : How many = number -- How many pupils are in the classe? How well = capacity -- How well can you tapdance? How old = age -- How old are you? How often = frequency ... How ... How ... - Why = a reason ... A relative pronoun introduces ...
Me: *noming on a Fig Newton* You think the apple filled Newtons are called Isaac Newstons? Sam: No, they're called Johnny Newtons. Me: That doesn't make sense. *commence argument about Johnny Appleseed and a wikipedia search 15 minutes later to prove that we were both wrong*
Things that make you go...Hm!.Why do the keys on a drive-up ATM machine have Braille on them? Why do gas furnaces have to be vented to the outside and gas stoves don't? Who or what are Fig Newton cookies named after? :) :) :)
The moment when you fold a Fig Newton in half, and then unfold it back to its original shape and it looks as if nothing happened.CREPE!!!
My husband is officially rechristened the Cookie Monster! Out of a whole bag of Fig Newton thin cookies that he bought this afternoon, I only got 2 1/2 and the rest are already gone!
New generation- my kids do not know these names - Twinkie, Ding Dong, Zinger, Snowball, *** *** and Fig Newton! They know kale though!!
So, you've just watched your baseball team suffer through another loss while getting no hits, what'll you do? I suggest it's time to belly up to the bar and eat a Fig Newton or two.
I can't eat a Fig Newton without thinking of the last time I saw B.B. King, at the time we were both staying at the same hotel in NYC, we both just happen to get up early & take a walk albeit not far from the Hotel, down to a little deli/store around the corner from the Ed Sullivan theatre..we're standing in line & he starts talking about the price of Fig Newtons, how outrageous they are these days at five dollars a package... We shared a tiny round table, he ate his cookies, I drank my coffee, listened, & we watched NY wake up & go to work. -BL
Is it wrong that I find Crystal Newton irresistible now that she is married. She's always been hot as hades but she knows how to work it now... I want to be loved in a Newton Sammich and I ain't talkin no Fig Newton either... rawr
LOL...I just Googled Becky Newton. I think I may resemble a Fig Newton, more than I do, Becky Newton.but thanks for the nearsighted compliment just the same.
A fresh fig plucked straight from the tree make a Fig Newton akin to eating wet cardboard with a little syrup.
Issac Newton witnesses an apple fall to the ground and figures out that the moon is constantly falling towards the Earth, but due to the gravity of the Earth, is in constant orbit. Discovers gravity. Then, to prove his theory, he invents calculus... All before the age of 26. Meanwhile, i'm wondering whats inside a Fig Newton.
I ate my first fresh figs today. Up to now, my only experience with a fig has been the Fig Newton. The fresh figs were good, but not as good as the Fig Newtons.
A few years back a company named ViaSat bought a small fledgling satellite internet company named Wildblue. Before the merger, the Wildblue home base was in Colorado and they provided pretty decent internet service to those of us who choose to live a quieter life style in the rural areas.so Wildblue over sold their service the speeds kept getting slower...now, due to the fact that launching another satellite costs millions (maybe billions now) a bunch of "twinks" from sunny Cal called ViaSat bought Wildblue and now the service is even worse than before.and we all know that the "twinkie" lifestyle in California is very expensive , what with all the HIV meds and the Medicinal Marajuana.so they pressure us into upgrading by cranking down our speed and feigning equipment malfunction on our end, when in truth, the little runny nosed brats just want more money for their extravagant lifestyles and they can get away with it because the Almighty Government doesn't give a flying Fig Newton and ALL utility based co ...
Right, so. When I was little girl in Louisiana, we had a fig tree in our backyard. A portion of that tree visited our neighbors property where he, one Mr. Guidry, plucked those figs and jarred jam upon occasion. We, of course, were thrilled on the days we received a jar... of fig jam... made from our tree. Well, every time I have a Fig Newton, I reminisce of those days. And that tree. Figs. The fruit of my youth.
"Isaac Newton, the father of calculus, was also the father of the Fig Newton...GOTCHA! just kidding guys he's not...maybe"
Scott just gave Einstein a Fig Newton and I couldn't help but think how much Einstein sounded like Bobo smakin' away on that thing! And just when I thought he might be done . . .he continued to use his 4 inch tongue to lick all around his mouth for another 5 minutes! I don't think it's cute, just sayin'! (Maybe a little cute, cause its my puppy-love, but equally as annoying!)
Faithfully and Fruitfully Luke 13:1-9 Let’s be honest, this reading from Luke is confusing at best. It begins with a question about a tragedy and ends with a parable that makes us think Jesus doesn’t like Fig Newton's. But even though the context may have changed over the years, the questions that this passage raises, our questions about why things happen, remain the same. When tragedy strikes we want to know why and when our faith forces us to not only ask why, but to ask what now, we don’t always know how to ground ourselves or what tomorrow may bring. I want to be an optimists, but how do we look out into our world and not shiver remembering what happened at an elementary school in Newtown moments after parents left their children at the front door believing that this day that will now live on in infamy was not be like any other that came before it? How do we not ask why in the face of a world where Amish school children were ambushed in Lancaster, PA, where Sikhs were attacked in Wis ...
Where the adventurers impersonate Imperial Navy officers to rescue the family of an alien orphan. Based on Carl and Kay's notes from the game on Sunday, the 9th of February 2013. Location: Imperial Research Station Gamma, Vanegen, Rhylanor Subsector Imperial Date: 003-1103 As told by Fig Newton and Kipenzi Momoh of the Skylark 2. "With cruelty and oppression it is everybody's business to interfere when they see it" - Anna Sewell, Black Beauty That, as much as a basic lack of common sense, was what got us into an Imperial Research Facility, having flown down through a no-fly zone to impersonate Imperial Naval personnel. And now, the rest of the story... 003-1103 about 0600 We left off with Kipenzi and Leon in the upper level of the research station, looking for someone to talk to. They did not have long to wait. With the sound of a motor and a metal clink as a railing opened up, a robot appeared out of the central service shaft and addressed them. The ro ...
AU should plant fig trees and grow'em another Newton.
Sitting here at the laundry watching all these clothes spin but can't stop wondering how in the fly fig newton did i get here.
I hear all these new commercials for weight loss pills... Get off your lazy *** and do some jumping jacks
If you guys haven't had a Fig Newton in a while, you should. They are delicious.
"I'm gonna write about that guy... Fig Newton" -
That was not Fig Newtons worthy. v.V
After a day of house clleaning I deserve a cup of coffee.
When I made the choice of not spending close to thirty bucks for my food and Dom food at the movie theatre. Instead I went to cvs and got two bottles of flavored water $.88 each, two backs of cookies 1 Lorene and one fig newton at $2.50 buy one get one free and two packs of orange gummy slices at $.88. So spending under $15.00
A man in a visor (backwards or otherwise) who isn't playing volleyball or golf is a problem. Thoughts?
All I've eaten today is pizza, oranges, and a fig newton.
Is Sarah and Fig dated we could call them Fig Newton
I am rediscovering the deliciousness that is a Fig Newton...and can't decide if I feel like a child or a senior citizen.
I just thought they where invented by someone's named Fig Newton...
It's been almost 50years but I still can't eat Fig Newtons My brother jerry had grossed me out He stuck his finger in his ear pulled it out (i didn't see him put the filling of a fig newton on his finger) He said wow looks like fig newton and ate it . Now I gross out my kids/grandkids with same trick then say hey I think we have Fig Newtons and offer them some saying now I know where the filling comes from lol. Thanks jerry because of your wicked sense of humor I've bee. Able to torture generations of kids .
It was a good time at the Roxy Theatre worshipping last night. Heard some great music, saw some good friends and had some REALLY GREAT!! conversation. (you know who you are. :) )
Someone take our phones away when were drunk!
thought of U the other day. I had a fig newton craving that nearly made me commit a crime. I had 2 have several, so dang good!!
WATCH LIVE: Punxsutawney Phil predicts an early spring
it's a *** fig newton. Give the kid 15 Reese's cups and then we can talk about too much sugar.
the answer is no - 1 fig newton did not make him sick unless it was food poisoning. Blaming it on the sugar content is silly.
I am sick. Got the flu. Feel like death eating a fig Newton..
I am the only person on the internet googling "can feeding your 15 month old one fig newton make him projectile vomit" apparently.
The boy puked twice yesterday, apparently. It's being blamed on my having fed him a single Fig Newton in the morning and the sugar content.
I don't think I've ever eaten a fig except for in newton form
I would strip for a newton of the fig type
I really hate dropping my fig newton bar are the *** floor!
We could have been shanked by a fig newton today! Katelynn Phalen
I'm so blessed to have such perfect people in my life ❤
I am so confused. Wait. There was no girlfriend? It was an imaginary girlfriend? ok And there were no prostitutes? Were they imaginary too? Wow there was a week in the news. Wait It was all imaginary.
My Son and I were having a sweet moment with him cuddling on my lap while I worked on my laptop... Fig Newton was just sneezed all over my laptop.not such a sweet moment anymore.
Why didn't anyone tell me 1/16 was Fig Newton Day? I would have probably bought some and maybe eaten like half of one.
Thoughts on the trees being cut down at Toomers Corner? Apparently, they are not expected to survive and Auburn officials have decided to take them down on April 20th after their A-Day game.
Photo: corgiaddict: Sir Issac “Fig” Newton seems to have collapsed under the weight of his own fluffiness.
Political correctness has whites so intimidated that one of my carriers was afraid to use the "B" word when referring to the dock assistant, who happens to be "black." He said the guy was "dark-complected." This, coming from a guy who has voted for Obama twice and is a hardcore blue-collar Democrat.
Emily Haddin Dudley Is it a fig newton of my imagination that girl scout cookies are in?
*nods, smiling* Good. He's much smarter and wiser than I am. Trust me. // Just a Fig Newton of my imagination... >.>
It's been an insane day or so. Nina gets her first 2 college acceptance letters (and scholarships!), Buddy plays his first show tonight, my wife's first trip to Miami, and I just ate a foie gras empanada. It's like a fig newton from *** ..
Despite exhaustive efforts to save the historic oaks at Toomer's Corner in Auburn, University officials say they see no chance of survival for the trees. Now they're formulating a plan to send the
"I don't know who did that it was the fig newton guy" -Becca
Thought I wanted fries salmon chips but ended up eating fig newton bar lol ..its a sign
There’s going to be a “Celebrate the Tradition” block party at Toomer’s Corner on Saturday, April 20, after Auburn’s A-Day football game.
I recently had a fig newton and liked it. Is something wrong with me?
Cross another food you never thought you'd see off your list.
A fig by any other name but Newton, just can't not be! Ya' know what I'm sayin' here. :)
Side note- it's amazing how a new phone case makes everything feel new...right!?
Nabisco sure has gone in a stupid direction with their so-called resealable packaging. I defy you to get out the first Fig Newton unscathed.
Cam Fig Newton's on with Mike. What a *** What separates him from RGIII and Kaepernick ? 50+ points of IQ.
Coworker keeps walking by my office silently mouthing "I want a fig newton." Ever do that? That's not what you THINK they're saying.
sorry for scaring you, but thanks for the Fig Newton👍
I dropped half a fig newton on the floor and left it there
Just had a fig newton for the first time in quite some time. Let me say, I was rather disappointed. I used to eat those by the sleeve
Can we just take a moment of silence for all of the fallen BALTO fish.. It was 6 days.. Rest in peace Samuel fig Newton.. Rest in peace.
If you can't laugh at yourself then what's the point?!
Why doesn't the union serve sushi anymore?!
Kaepernick is more like Randall Cunningham than Fig Newton.
My irish spring speed stick has given out, after 4 (four) years. What should I do?
ima need condoms, KY jelly, and fig Newton's before we do this
I'll believe your just a cookie or fig newton until you all meet me this Tuesday for tacos
"And then Newton was like 'WELL YOU KNOW WHAT I'll just invent this awesome fig bar' and it made kids for generations happy."
Just got home yesterday from emergency back surgery last sunday morning. It is good to be home and begin mending. Thanks to family and friends for all your support. God Bless Bob Newton
That moment when u see kids wearing light up shoes and think to yourself that you use to rock those.
Fig Newton's are a very underrated snack
Had a Fig Newton Yesterday, and today, I am 75 years old.
Is today the day chocolate face reopens? It's been a month and I can't go much longer without one of those cupcakes or brownies!
Anyone know if you can give pediasure to a 2 yr old?
My brother Chris (Ellie and Kate's dad) just texted me: "I am eating a Fig Newton and I've never been more enraged in my life."
If guns kill people, then pencils misspell words, vehicles make you drive drunk, spoons make people fat, and matches cause arson. If there must be a ban on guns, we must ban spoons, matches and vehicles..as all of those have a direct link to human deaths. Pencils should have a waiting period, a written test and background check, to ensure they are not used by illiterates.
In the Blog" The Newton that's not a Fig", We saw how John Newton & the English Bulldog were resolute about certain pursuits. It reminds me of a movie I saw years ago called "Iron Will". It was about a young man who was in a dog sled race, & wouldn't be deterred from his goal of winning, no matter what! That movie brings to mind Jesus in the garden, prior to His arrest. He prayed fervently for the Father's will to be done, & not His own. He was, "Resolutely", drawing a line in the proverbial sand. "Not my will, but thy will be done"! It's a great prayer to start any day. "Just as the Son of Man came not to be served , but to serve, & to give His life as a ransom for many."Mt.20:28
Things to remember. Don't cook spicy food when Ur taste buds are not working. I know that it is spicy because of my heartburn and Bryan is crying
True or False: The Fig Newton was named after Newton, Massachusetts.
im not gonna lie i love me some Fig Newton cookies.
Cooking slow-simmered boneless chicken breasts with sides of angel hair pasta with walnut sauce, and peas. Fig Newton apple compote for dessert. It's only 2:42. Too early to start drinkin' tequila.
m good! Breakfast: orange/cranberry muffin--Muffins by Belinda! Lunch: salmon w/ roasted garlic teriyaki and almond crust, steamed broccolli and quinoa; followed by an orange Today's snack: fig newton cookies and hot chocolate!
Forever in my mind only you, the pieces in my eye run away with you.
Millions saw the apple fall, but only Newton asked why.
Had a good dream last night. Dreamt I was bubble wrapped in a mound of pecans holdin a twizzler in my left hand, a fig newton in my right hand being slapped by bobby brown.
Recovering from a long days night. Straight up had fun. Shout out to all my homies. ;)
11 weeks and the baby is the size of a fig! Love you Gregory Rudd
Hope everyone's doing OK in this dreadful weather. Please avoid going out unless necessary. There are trees coming down - and in this weather it's harder to see. There's debris on roads inundated by seawater too. I've reported trees down across roads at Keogh St Sandgate (next to Dowse Lagoon - near Southerden St) and Sunday Street Shorncliffe and an old fig split in half on the footpath on corner of Allpass Parade and Yundah Streets. Crews will be out as soon as they can. You can report trees down to the Council's contact centre on 34038. If the trees have brought down power lines, please report that to Energex not Council. Their emergency number for power lines down is 131962.
If you like Fig Newtons, unfriend me. Because eventually we are going to have a falling out and better nip it in the bud
That moment when you realize...you've never tasted a fig that was not in "newton" form.
I have neither seen nor heard my roommates in 20hours.. hmm..
Carolyn "Duval, wait wait wait a minute: maybe this really isn't the best idea we've ever had. duval : "ya think?!"
Going to see my baby boy next weekend.I need a Kaleb Newton fix!
We love FIGS! As one of the richest plant sources of calcium, figs are also one of the first plants cultivated by humans. How do you like to eat your figs?
Speaking of Crawleys, one of our classmates at Loyola had a thing for mah lil sister Win, so he used to hang with us a lot. And Winsty was so sweet to him, even though she wasn't the slightest bit interested. Harry was a short-haired activist with a greasy pizza face who always wore a beige trench coat and liked to tell us what he had for lunch that day: "A grilled cheese sandwich cut in half diagonally, some cottage cheese and a couple of Fig Newtons."
Did you know that thousands attended the March for Life Rally in DC yesterday? Not a word about the 55 million children casually killed over the last 40 years in the mainstream media. I have owned several guns for the last 40 years and they have killed no one.
Going to attempt to find some living thing out there in that thing they call the outdoors to photograph this evening. Wish me luck!
Nothing is sadder than entering the fig newton code by accident when you wanted M & Ms from the vending machine. Nothing.
Just so you know, I’ve never won a Nobel Prize for physics. You know who else never won? Isaac Newton! So I’m in great company.
Well food poisoning was not the case. Something is going on with my tummy. Bad gas, nausea here and there strange noises coming from my tummy and can't eat much and diarrhea. Overall feeling like blah. What the ***
Hello! I would like to let everyone know that very soon, I will be unveiling a new FB page in JD's honor- The JD Take A Stand Foundation- Take A Stand Against Paralysis is a non-profit organization that I created to educate & inform but mostly to INSPIRE! I (along with many other family members going thru the same thing) am tired of the lack of response in funding, science, the FDA, the WORLD regarding SCI (Spinal Cord Injury) Something MUST be done about it! Everyone deserves a chance at a better life & it saddens me beyond belief that in a world with the technological advances we have today, that nothing is in motion for people living with SCI. Our goals are to not only create funding, but to educate the world about SCI & what it really means to fight that fight. We all "talk the talk"- but now we must "walk the walk" for SCI so they can have their lives back!! Thanx & Cheers for now;)
Yay we can be released from overtime starting Sunday, can I hear a Yes Please! Off Sun/Mon like old times, yipe! Scream 'n Shout!
I have a new moisturizer that can be used on the face, eyes, arms, legs, any where on the body. A friend recommended and then gave me virgin coconut oil. (I hope she didn't think I would cook with it). It is making my skin so soft. The one draw back is that when I put it on, Asher tries to lick it all off!
I'm looking online for a good pair of running shoes...any suggestions? Rochelle?
I can't type out statuses correctly on this phone to save my life.. Makes being snarky, sarcastic and subversive very fig fibula damnit..
Taran Langland, Josh Michaelson, and Tanner Groth are the coolest and not Kali RaeAnn Urbach
Well checking in after a bit!!! Still not smoking 3 months!! Proud but not proud to say I are an entire row of what I like to say not as fattening as a real cookie!! Hello fig newton !! Not!!
But what's this??! The Fig Newton package in the Special Top Secret Barnyard Cookie Area has been opened, and more than half of the Newtons are gone?? The Dirt Farmer was standing there at the time and put his head down in shame. He apologized profusely. Fear not! I shall some how make an appropriate Fig Newton Layer cake for little Paco's birthday. Step aside Martha Stewart.
Apparently some of you are waiting on me to say something funny. Um...fahrvergnügen. There you go. Stay tuned. I will be back after dealing with a few health issues.
What does a monkey at the zoo have in common with a fig newton.nothing right?? Think again there both sometimes brown
Brother Walton I'm going to talk to the creator for a lil while. Want me to give him a message?
I need some ideas for a tattoo somebody help
I hate days when there is nothing to do or Look forward to doin lol
As I reach for the third gig newton after dinner, Kendra says, "you know the serving size is two, right?" I enjoyed that one the most of the three.
Drinking tea from my disappearing TARDIS mug, eating Fig Newton biscuit cookies, and figuring out how to combine my two favorite subjects for my senior project. Life is good.
Thank you, NFL, for putting my 2 favorite teams in the Superbowl! It's a win/win for me!!
Joker couldn't get Timmons to UK now Florida offers and he will visit.
Probably an ancient question: deglet or medjool dates? Can't decide which I like more...
How many laws of physics can you stuff inside a fig newton? Answer: Relatively few.
A fig newton is a nasty wannabe pop tart !
It's a beautiful morning in Oklahoma. A little chilly, but not too bad. I'm at work with my wonderful partner, Lacey Rodriguez, great coworkers on the other truck (Terry Moore & Eileen McKenna Lubinski) and a fun dispatcher, Holly Schneider, to work with. Thinking about the old times and the pranks we played back when Michael Scott worked here. And it's time to go save a life...
Oowie gooey soft n chewy inside, tender flaky crispy golden outside, wrap it up and what so you get, the big fig newton
I think it's so cruel that they put a McDonalds right next to Anytime Fitness. So I briskly walk half a mile and then go over to McDonalds and get three Big Macs...those balance each other out, don't they?
My kindle is no longer hungry but is always looking for a snack!!
Excuse me, I might drink a little more than I should tonight! Can't wait BITS!
I just found out that apparently,"if you don't give a feather or a fig you could turn out to be a pig." Why hasn't anybody told me this before? In 42 years I've never even considered giving anybody a feather or a friggin fig. Thanks for not alerting me to this people. I've been risking bacon status for over 4 decades and you couldn't be bothered to just let me know I had to give somebody a freaking feather or a newton. You guys all suck.
Andrew PEACHFUZZ will be playing old peachfuzz songs, new peachfuzz songs, and songs from my favorite artists such as Wayne Newton, Juice Newton, Fig Newton, Sir Isaac Newton, and many more! The Haunted Trailer jams!
Never had a fig newton before because
This is a FEMA fig Newton. May you never have to eat one!
The only good thing about newton mass is they share. The same name as my favorite fig snack
My blueberry scone tastes a bit like a Fig Newton. Yummy but confusing.
My French professor literally just called French class "Fig-newton". And he had no idea. Scary yet hilarious?
Meal post Apple slices with fig newton.
Kobe Bryant can't even win with mike brown... At least lebron could with regular season games with him
I really really wanna go to practice today 🙏⚽
So happy I've been reunited with my beloved Fig Newtons after 4 years of Fig Newton-less life
I can do this. I am a dude. I'm a hunky dude. I'm a badass hunky dude!
Battery is the size of a fig newton.
I admire the confidence of black girls to make mirror pics of just themselves their own backgrounds on their phones
Tim: How come you got Chick Fil a and I'm sittin here eatin a Fig Newton?😂 Lmao love roe daddy!!
I'm in love with a man named fig newton
Poll of the day: Fig Newton or Isaac Newton?
This the start of a beautiful friendship
is this a joke uhhh HANDS DOWN my man Joey 😘
I knows, right. Imagine if I actually gave a flying fig newton. I get to sleep in my own bed for 4 nights in a row.
That's completely unfair to the glorious mediocrity of a fig newton.
I know right. He's more like a fig newton.
Like Fig Newton's. But i put grape juice in the fridge...
I miss giving Ozzy the crusts of my pizza
I wanna wake up where you are. I won't say anything at all. 🎧😄
I just tried my first my Fig Newton. I approve. Kinda.
Honestly I'm not even eating Fig Newtons but newton is just such a fun word
Waiting for Robert to finish loading...then its off to meridian...then back to hattiesburg then to fig Newton.
you look like a corndog…on campus looking like a life size Fig Newton.
Good for me for elbowing my Brody Jenner lover look-a-like in the back of the head
funny I heard the same thing last year for Cam "Fig" Newton. How is he working out down in NC?
guess I'm not going to practice again😕
"Lol do y'all even rap" nope just make sure the words rhyme ya dig...my nig...cookie monster newton..Fig
"Can't get enough of my huge girlfriend! She's an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, surrounded by a fig newton."
praying for indoor practice. I'm not trying to get even more sick 🙏
This is great, i was getting spammed but then made a directioner buddy. GOOD DAY
The White Feathered Octopus 2012 a novel An excerpt from the book: This is the peak of the movie talking about Danny Kaye in Wonderman! It explains everything! Post War World Two, healing would the mind and the heart The thinker and the clown! What is this trick photography, YES IT IS! Two-way ticket, the 4-d man, the clown is the trickerts- No telling what I can do when I learn the ropes, Oh what a set up when I wasted all that time living The secrets of life were solid for a dime (nothing a symbolic boon at best) they offer all the various – lustful, muses each a color of the rainbow, the young lover pulls upon them all, the solution, the soul union, to finding love either getting the man you want to notice you or to find new lover or both is to be polyamorius to play the field, not just with love, Song of Solomon, to play the field of life to explore all the different kinds of being you can be, mother, lover, *** child, wife, ex-wife, monster, body, object, image. With young man falling before you . ...
*Driving home while D is enjoying a Fig Newton. I mention that my Pap loved Fig Newtons. I was asked where my Pap is. I explain that he is in Heaven with God. "But when is he coming back to Hagerstown?" I had to smile*
Looks like round two for the migraines, and it's about to be a TKO. Why is it that when mom has a migraine, the kids get louder and act up more? Is that some law of science or something? Fig Newton's law or something .
Im never eating another fig newton
Christians- now is the time to look to God and trust Him and only Him for the future. The end is near. Revelations is coming alive and I'm so excited to see what will play out. Coffee, Fig newton, and the Wall Street Journal.
There is no other way to express my feelings right now than to think of the millions of ponies that will end up pink after they drink the millions of high fives that are sure to come. Bleak outlook for all those other newts. I believe that purple will be a great thing to add tonight. I'll start on that after I eat this toilet of paper airplanes flooding the crapes. I believe in batman. and because of that, I win! Welcome to the 18th century said the people from the 17th century. We have milk here that will not kill you, or at least that what they tell you. figure this one out you comic book shop owner. I believe this call was for you. Fig newton's theory was wrong! All wrong! it's not really fruit! They lie! As I once stated before, "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for the World of Warcraft you silly stale banana humper!" Oh the outcome might happen. I honestly refrigerate my bread. It keeps longer. I try to win football games by yelling at the screen, but all that does it en ...
For at least the fourth straight presidential election the victor was very beatable. As for our candidates I quote Groucho Marx: "The gate swung open and a fig newton entered." Where are our leaders?
So I bought a pack of Fig Newtons at random while in line at Wawa because I thought "Hey, I haven't had a Fig Newton since I was a kid!" I just realized that I don't remember if I actually ever liked Fig Newtons though, so I haven't braved the pouch yet.
want a laugh? Look at someone and without speaking, mouth the words "I want a fig newton" and watch their reaction :)
I may not be "sane", maybe im not "normal". Perhaps i think up random things and live in different reality then most people but i know one thing, if another fig newton teaches me to yodel im not going to be happy.
Big Fig was made to act *** on purpose to promote Fig Newtons.
Okay, this is annoying; the puppy is heavy enough now that when he jumps into the passenger seat of the Jetta, he sets off the alarm and a ding-ding-ding goes off every 15 seconds! Other than that, the new wheels are far-fig-newton, man. I'm feeling like a 53%er!
In physics, would one kilogram of falling figs equal one fig newton? In other measurements, would ten cards equal one decacards? and could you call a half bath a demijohn?
Dear brother n law!! Newton we will know one day why God decided to call you home last year ,but we still miss you n grieve for you.we could understand easier if you had been sick,but we were under the impression you were healthy n fine.for you to be here one second then gone the next ,well that blew all of us away.Newton we know you're happy in Heaven,but we're sad down here. if I could just hear one more corny joke from you,but that is not to be!! WE LOVE N MISS YOU FIG NEWTON!! til we meet again! your sis n law!!!
Watched the "athletic bowl" and was underwhelmed by RG3 and Fig newton. I saw a lot of trying to do too much by oneself, and QB's getting hurt with big hits by defensive players.
Everybody lost in the NFC east today. Crazy! At least the Cowboys and Giants lost to good teams. Washington lost to Can (fig) Newton. A team who lost 5 straight.
Did I just hear right that RGWho? Lost to the 1-6 crybaby Fig Newton and the Panthers?
Redskins... Fail... Why not throw a Hail Mary with your last 27 seconds? Fig Newton looked pretty good today.
What did they feed those kitty cats today?? Fig Newton.. You need to stop with the superman bs until you have more wins under your belt!! Go Panthers!!!
Well, first Panther's drive. Fig Newton overthrows a wide-open Steve Smith for a first down, then bounces the ball to Olsen for an incompletion that wouldn't have been a first down anyway. Then on defense, Hardy commits a personal foul after the defense holds, on 3rd down, and Redskins drive down for a field goal. Poor execution, poor decisions, poor coaching.as usual.
Feels weird not to be running today or having someone forcing me to eat a fig newton.
OK Mr. Fig Newton.are you ready to find out who the real superman is.RG3!
"If you're going to die, go out in style." ^my grandmother, refering to my choice of lunch. (raspberries, oreos and fig newton fruit thins.)
I'm gonna get a huge fig newton sticker on my windshield
I'm pretty sure Tennessee is good enough at football that we deserve to go to the Fig Newton-Pepto Bismol Quazanaka Bowl . maybe.
Day 6: Still no power (what else is new). I'm starting to think that LIPA is just a fig newton of our imagination. Missing weekend soccer matches kinda *** but it is what it is. Almost out of Korn so that bottle of Tito's will be getting tapped onto this weekend.
Fig Newton's always look good to me. I always give them a chance and try them even if they always end up tasting like ***
"Figures. I finally find the perfect fella and he's a fig newton of someone else's imagination."
welp it's just about 4 o'clock Fig Newton time.
So...my little man is currently falling asleep with a fig newton in his hand...drops it...wakes up to take a bite but is eating with his eyes closed. Tired guy!
Bout to head home n take care of the doggy!!! and the kids of course too! I love my izeck fig newton my Rog nana and my peanut Rae! They mean everything in the whole world too me!
Awesome ride to the office on the motorcycle. Loving this cool weather! Coffee, fig newton, and the news as per my usual. Praising God for some huge things and expecting Him to do something huge!
My fantasy team bites monkey balls. Jamaal Charles, Fig Newton, Megatron, you're all killing me!!!
New way to get my dog to take his allergy medicine... stuck a pill inside ea end of a fig Newton @ the fig part, broke n Half, gobbled both halves up n loved it! Plus I didn't hv the mess of makin his usual pnut butter sndWich
My little girls are sick :( Here is my little Al Bundy and my creative food master with her fig newton 'bunny-bears'
almost O Dark 50 and no Star Bucks hm walmart and Fig newton's LOL
OMG Sarah Britton you genius! This is one snack treat I'll definitely relishing both eating and making. Get a load of those ingredients packaged into the all too familiar fig newton (fig roll?) :D--
me- we've gone all Halloween with no candy.. -___- Riss- omg I know. want a fig newton.. me- ..yeah!
If I could have it my way, I would name hurricanes after baked goods. You would turn on your tv and see that Hurricane Fig Newton is about to make landfall.
Dear NFL Network, Please tell Mike Mayock to shut up. He has an annoying voice that reminds me of Fran Drescher. He constantly contradicts himself. And he has the football IQ of a Fig Newton. Please have him go back to his off-season job of being a tornado warning siren in Northern Oklahoma. Sincerely, Every NFL Fan in the world
Popcorn & Fig Newton's for supper tonight. I love being a grown up.
Watching Craig Ferguson and he's trying to guess an actor's name, and I laughed for the name they came up with was ironic or whatever. Monica Potter: "His name resembles yours... Craig." CF: "OH he was in Poltergeist, he was coach... Craig... Craig. Newton?" MP: "Newton? Craig Newton? Like Fig Newton? No!"
I don't know if the person responsible for the Fig Newton is Issac or Olivia or Juice or Wayne; regardless, Thank You!
*** i miss my *** i think ill pour out a little liqour. R.I.P. to da big Fig Newton.
In half a drive of garbage time, Horse Balls Derek Anderson helped my fantasy team more than Fig Newton.
We folks the Carolina Panthers stink. Turn this game off. Cam Newton more like Fig Newton.
U tell me U show me U n envolve me... Thats what the boss said. 40 a job straight out of lil fayette county Fig Newton!
National debt to hit 16 trillion as the democratic convention kicks off! Obama will blame Bush & you & me & Clint & Isaac & Fig Newton!
Oscar Pistorius New Zealand Prince George Malaysia Airlines Family Dollar South African Peaches Geldof General Motors Boston Marathon Mickey Rooney Maria Miller Tamerlan Tsarnaev Champions League Ultimate Warrior Nigel Evans Wall Street Jane Pauley Fort Hood Manchester United David Moyes Los Angeles Mad Men Reeva Steenkamp Pope Francis David Letterman Prince William Indian Ocean Las Vegas Supreme Court Anne Hathaway Rory Mcilroy North Korea Kim Jong Rolling Stone South Africa Narendra Modi Preston Crown Court Katherine Heigl Rock Hall Kate Middleton David Cameron Hillary Clinton Al Sharpton Bayern Munich Mary Barra Jesus Christ June Steenkamp New England Middle East Per Month Oprah Winfrey New Jersey Home Page Internet Explorer 8 Zach Braff Congress Party Bharatiya Janata Party Jon Stewart Ellie Goulding Peter Jackson Lindsay Lohan Security Council Les Miserables Katie Couric Hank Aaron Gerrie Nel First World War Felix Dennis Chief Keef Prime Minister La Paz President Obama White Sox Anthony Bourdain Aston Villa Big Society Great British Bake Off Great War Sheryl Sandberg Amanda Bynes Arsene Wenger Alex Salmond Roll Hall Taylor Swift Rob Lowe Lois Lerner Volunteer State Greta Van Susteren Paula Yates Jump Street Jeremy Paxman Star Wars Justice Department Sajid Javid Duane Reade Eric Holder Sports Illustrated Pay Attention Naya Rivera Andrew Garfield